Tired~ really tired...
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
hai~~ i felt that this whole week is so physically and mentally drain for me.. this whole week, 2 nights need to work, 2 nights got dance practise, the rest will have things like open house, cell group, service, dance class, dance rehearsal... so many things to do.. not enough sleep.. very tired..
but thank God that the exams are over last week.. if not.. think i can die le.. hai~
oh ya.. yesterday i got back my QA CA1 results.. i got 83 over 100.. haha.. i was so happy.. hehe.. this is my first time getting 80+ in exams in my whole poly life.. hehe.. i'm one step closer to the SMARTER goals that i've set last month. the goal is that i wanna score all A's for all the modules that i take.. hee.. :)
anyway.. back to this week.. besides physically drain.. i really really felt mentally drain also.. in school and outside school.. there's always pressures around. especially true in school.. not only in school work, but other things also.. i don't know when does it start, i felt that all these things happen after last friday. i don't know how these thing started. and i don't want this to start. but i really felt that all the things that developed so much since starting of july 2004 is coming to an end. many times i really want to give it up. but i can't. this thing is been so long. i don't want to end just like this, i don't want to end it at all. but i really felt there's a difference. everytime i'm in school, i don't feel the same way that i'm used to be. last time, i'm looking forward to go to school everyday, but now.. hai~ i really don't know what to do. felt so lost. it's really obvious that things are not the same as last time, i can tell it. although nobody said anything about it, i knew there's something wrong there. but i don't want to deal with all these now.. i'm tired, just too tired. i need rest.
i think many of you don't know what am i talking about.. if you don't just ignore it. it's too personal for me to share. i don't want things to get worse. or maybe all these things that i've said last paragraph are just my imaginations.
how i wish that everything will run very smoothly. i don't know why, things starts to fall apart.. many times i really can't take it anymore. why there's such a dramatic change just these few days alone. sometimes i wish things can start all over again. i thought about all these things that happened these few days.. i always ask myself.. is this really my fault? is it really wrong to do all these? isn't i supposed to be truthful, is it wrong to think the way what the norm don't? is it wrong to score high marks? is it wrong to be busy? is it wrong... hai~~ i'm tired. really very tired.. sick of all these things.. i really wanted this school year to end soon..
hai~ so sorry.. i'm really in a bad mood today.. maybe because i'm quite physically tired.. i wish this will be over soon... real soon..
&lovin' Bb at 10:05 AM♥
Name: Manman<3
God's Little Girl, Bb, Dance, Love, W16, Paint, Food, Sleep